When a couple can come together when it comes to money, it can be very powerful.  Both for their relationship and their wallet.  When I’m working with couples, I like to cover the 3 C’s. 

 

Communicate, cooperate, and compromise. 

Communicate.  In other words, say what you mean, mean what say, and don’t say it mean!  Saying what you mean is being clear and concise.  Making someone read your mind, or interpret your innuendos is not being a clear communicator.   Thinking it through before saying it is a good way to practice saying what you mean.  Think about your words.  And then don’t say it mean.  If things do become too heated, decide to table the discussion until both parties have calmed down and had a chance to cool off.

Cooperate:  Work with your partner.  You may not particularly want what the other person does, but if you are willing to cooperate, and help the other person get what they need, they will be more willing to help you, and cooperate with you, to get what you need.

Finally, compromise.  It’s not all about you.  Sometimes, you have to sit back and let the other person get what they need before you get what you need.  Compromising is an excellent way to show love and respect for your partner.  And when you show a spirit of compromising, your partner will be more willing to compromise.  Win, Win!

The next time you are and your partner are discussing money, remember the 3 C’s.  Say what you mean, mean what you say, and don’t say it mean.